Transformers: Age of
Extinction
Worst Film of the Year 2014
You may
have realised that I am the champion of ‘bad’ movies. I even go back to my blu
ray boxset of the Transformers trilogy and actually enjoy myself while watching
it. I like Shia LaBoeuf, Jon Tuturro’s madness, the constant explosions and am
not even worried by the ridiculous plots. I find them genuinely entertaining so
I was first in line to see Michael Bay’s next attempt at assaulting my ears and
eyes. And honestly, I wish I’d stayed in the line and not went into the screen.
 |
| ...still more exciting than Transformers 4. |
After having initially refused to go back to Transformers after number two (Revenge of the Fallen), Bay openly
criticised it, agreeing with his haters and saying he would right his mistakes and prove everyone wrong
with number three (Dark of the Moon). He didn’t. And then the exact same thing happened with
number four. Bay’s idea to silence his haters (he must be very self conscious)
was to start a new trilogy and take it in a new direction. New cast, new tone
and ultimately, less fun. Assuming we’re stupid, Bay literally shows us that he
is aware of his mistakes and he is fixing them, playing out his little drama on
screen. We have a ridiculous, close, low angle shot of Nicola Peltz’s bum at
the start, mirroring Bay’s criticised pervy shots of Megan Fox and Rose
Huntington Whitely from the first films, but this time Bay has Marky Mark
Wahlberg comment on it! We also have a ridiculous, obnoxious over the top
comedic character at the start who is killed off in the first 20 minutes. So
this is it, Bay has taken it to the extreme and killed off all zanies and
perviness, time for a new kind of Transformers.
Bay
successfully kills his over the top comedy but unfortunately kills any kind of
fun or enjoyment that the previous films had. What we’re left with is a dull,
unentertaining, overly long mess of a film with absolutely zero likeable
characters. The Jaeger family don’t know how to joke or even smile, Optimus
Prime just acts like he can’t be bothered any more and honestly, I was rooting
for the bad guys. Kill them all, I don’t care. Ridiculous set pieces and half
of the action taking place on a horrible alien CGI ship, taking away any
familiarity or connection with the audience. The only highlight is a few
unintentional chuckles from Stanley Tucci as he’s clearly not taking his role
seriously and has likely never read the script.
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| To be fair all 3 minutes with the dinobots are pretty cool. |
Transformers:
AOE commits the worst crime possible in a film like Transformers- It’s flat out
boring. The one saving grace for the others is that love em or hate em, there’s
something that draws you in to watch and they’re great with a beer after work
but this piece of garbage should rot in the scrapheap. Michael Bay, this is
what happens when you go out to make a film just to prove people wrong. Move
on!
1.5/5
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