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Thoughts at 30

     Yesterday was my last day in my 20s. Flip, am I old now?

     I'm definitely guilty of being someone who puts too much stock in certain dates and occasions as a time to reflect and re-evaluate. I mean, look at this blog- I think every post is a new year's eve or a milestone birthday. 

And hey, this year's no different - but it might be the last time.

    I made a note that last year, on my 29th birthday, that my life at age 30 was on a wildly different trajectory than I had imagined it would be when I was younger. And in almost every way it's turned out alot better and a heck of alot more exciting!  I'm currently finishing up an animated short film, an absolute dream project that I never imagined I 'd be put in charge of and I have a hell of a stand up crew helping make something that is far too ambitious. I'm working in an industry I love, in a great house and in a long term relationship. I even have a tortoise (!)

    However, anyone knows me how driven and passionate I am and while that can be a huge strength of mine, I've also come to realise it can be my biggest weakness. I put tremendous pressure on myself to push myself and take EVERY opportunity that I can and also to create my own chances, rather than wait for life to hand them to me. It's led to a massive amount of learning in my industry and working on TV shows and films non stop for the last 7 or so years, but the truth is that I've not been living the most maintainable lifestyle, have neglected my social life, invested in relationships that haven't been worthy and I'm finally being caught up with by a long overdue burnout.

    So as I hit 30, I don't have any more lists or targets to make, because I think for my mental (and physical) health I need to chill out and catch up on some life away from the computer, away from my own ambition. I'm happy with where I am career-wise and don't need to compare it to anyone else, or be compared to anyone else. Time to take some time away from the screen to create some down time and re evaluate where I actually want to and should invest it- hobbies, friendships and health wise. I have some exciting projects in my mind, but they can take a year, two, ten- it doesn't matter. They'll get done when I feel like I can and have energy to invest.

    So here's to the next big milestone birthday where I have no idea where I'll be or where I'll end up, but hope to have a blast getting there, with the right people (and tortoise) around me.

Oh and here's a teaser for my almost completed short film Candlelight which should be doing the festival rounds from around the end of this year!

See you at the New Year's Blog post!

Old Scott





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